Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
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