I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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