none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
