Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Randomize