If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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