doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
