I want to walk on stilts...naked
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Woke up backwards on a recliner
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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