I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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