he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
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