If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
They took my balls.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
