Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
