What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
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