i jhust puked up my retainher.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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