No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
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