moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize