508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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