The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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