I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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