Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize
