id be glad to
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize
