I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
