May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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