They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
