Yo dont text me then not text me
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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