gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
