im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
