If that was your dad, he is hot
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
