erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.�
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Randomize
