Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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