Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
