4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
