Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Randomize
