Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize
