Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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