erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
