like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
