Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
