ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Randomize
