dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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