Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
