Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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