So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize