Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
