I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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