Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize