Fuck appropriateness.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
