carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
