It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
is it fun? or sober?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
