in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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