Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
